Saturday, November 5, 2011

Calming the Conflict

What will it take for me to keep my big mouth shut? One of my favorite lines in Annie Lennox’s song Why. (Click the link and listen to the lyrics) What will I gain being right or making you wrong? Is my goal to maintain my addiction to drama or am I simply not aware that having the last word is not a good recipe for peace and happiness. Do you find yourself constantly apologizing for outbursts and conflict over silly things? Then look inside and try to figure what presses you to argue and cause drama.

Why? What is it that drives you to not have the self control to just allow something to be said or done without your assessment of it as a personal attack or some other defensive judgment against you. It only takes one person to curb an argument. Wayne Dyer expresses one option to calming conflict, is to reply with “that’s interesting.” Listening and hearing what is being said or felt will help understand the point of view someone is trying to express. It doesn’t mean that you are agreeing the other person is right or wrong. It allows them to have their opinion and keeps yours intact without the conflict.