Monday, January 30, 2012

Man Law? Really? (A rant)

Ever wonder why men are so sensitive in the area of the scrotum? I have a theory that maybe it’s where most of them hide their emotions. I know most of you have probably seen the Bud Light commercials depicting a variety of men around a table discussing laws to be upheld in their gender society. I truly believe that men actually have an unspoken rule book that women are unaware exist. I am not particularly referring to rules of dating or sex, I am focusing on the rules of control.
For instance; say your guy is about to drive off for work and asks you if you want him to mail an envelope. You grab it and as he drives away, you think, how sweet.  A few moments later you get a call from him asking if you have stamps at home. You remember that you used them all to mail Christmas cards and tell him so. He replies, “That explains why there’s no stamp on this envelope.”
Now before you get into a whole explanation to him over the miscommunication, remember he asked to mail it for you. What you saw as an act of kindness turns into him chastising you. Some men seem to feel they have the right to remind us when they do things for us. And they do, but it earns them no points in the love bucket.
What about when they make their stuff, your stuff. Say he needs to check something out on the web. Using reversed psychology, he mentions it to you in an attempt to involve you in the needing to know what it is he’s checking out on the web. Before you realize it, you’re looking it up and learning all about it and he’s off to the golf course or sitting on the sofa watching sports. What happened? It was his needing.
One of y experiences was when his friend’s wife is on her second day of a drive from Texas to California. He calls to tell you that he’s just spoken with his friend and asks you to give his wife a call to check on her. You like her, so you call and actually have a nice conversation with plans to see each other soon. But before you can make the call, he calls you again to see if you actually did what he asked.  Is he your Dad reminding you to call Grandma to thank her for the gift she sent? Needless to say we had a long conversation about his follow-up call. I do not sit around all day picking lint balls out of my butt and watching the Soaps. I work too.
Now, we may feel it is our duty as wife, girlfriend, attend gatherings with the man in our lives. But when we analyze the reciprocity of this scenario, are things equal? Does he whine about why do we need to go to gatherings with your friends or family? Does he make up a host of reasons not to go? Does he start an argument?
I believe some men act this way because they are afraid that once they meet or interact with your friends and family, the true man will be revealed. Love maybe blind, but friends and family have a way of seeing through our love cloud.
Most women have the ability to take care of things even in their sleep.  We are very capable of multi-tasking. Men on the other hand can easily do more than one thing at a time. Let’s see there’s sports and sex, beer and sex, their buddies and sex (not necessarily together but you never know with the “down low” thing), eating and sex; sleeping and sex, and work and sex. Whew! Masters at multi-tasking.
And yet another thing; men must realize that when we discuss things with them, we are not asking for them to fix the situation or necessarily for their approval. Most of us take very good care of them, ourselves, the kids, the house, our jobs and family and friends. How many men do the laundry, fold the laundry, put away the laundry, iron, mop the floors, clean the showers and toilets, vacuum, dust, grocery shop replace the toilet paper on the rack, change diapers, care for the kids, play taxi, help with home work, have dinner ready, etc. etc.?
Real women have real lives. For every man who feels the need to control their woman like a game boy, there is a woman that will not put up with all the unspoken man laws. Besides, if you try to enforce those laws, you will be working on your joy stick.